Ascertain that a text is agreeable to read

I have a draft that needs to be agreeable to read for an upcoming artist contract review meeting on Friday. Read it as a fatigued reader at 8 p.m., flag sentences that stall comprehension, mark passive voice that hides responsibility, and suggest one-line rewrites that preserve legal meaning but read conversationally. Prioritize clarity in the signature and payment sections.

Before I send this draft to the conference manager and the artist liaison, make it easy to scan: pull the main commitment into the first paragraph, label the payment schedule so a reviewer can find dates and amounts at a glance, and highlight any clauses that could make an artist hesitate about cancellation or rider requests.

I just sent the artist contract to Nina in artist relations and she replied that the tone sounds legalistic and will put artists off. I’m worried editing will change legal meaning and procurement wants the same clauses. I cannot tell Nina the exact legal limits without counsel. Is the likely problem tone or content, and what is the best next move to make it readable without opening legal risk?

Across several artist contracts, reviewers consistently mark the same areas as 'too dense' and we lose time clarifying payment and cancellation. Where are we repeatedly creating friction, and what one drafting habit should I adopt to cut review cycles by half?