What are some fun activities to do with a 10-year-old?
Try reverse geocaching! Hide a small, personalized treasure in a public place and give your 10-year-old GPS coordinates to find it. It's like a real-life video game that gets you both exploring and creating memories.
What's one thing your 10-year-old is passionate about that you secretly dislike? What would happen if you asked them to teach you about it?
It starts slowly. First, it's the bedroom door, closed more often than it's open. Then it's the door to their inner world. Suddenly, finding fun activities for 10 year olds feels impossible. You feel shut out. You miss the days when you were their favorite person. Now, things to do with a 10 year old feel like a battle. You want to know what fun activities for kids age 10 still work. How do you get the key back?
Your 10-year-old's brain is changing fast. Pre-teens are driven by social acceptance and figuring out where they fit in. A key part of this is developing their own interests, separate from you. When you criticize their hobbies, you risk damaging your connection. Neurologist Daniel Siegel calls this "mindsight", the ability to understand another's mental perspective. If you dismiss their passions, expect resistance. Instead, become curious. Ask them to teach you about their favorite video game. You might be surprised by what you learn and how much closer you become.
Aisha, 10, of Mumbai, loves Bollywood dance. Her mom wants her to focus on studying. Aisha feels like her mom doesn't understand her. She withdraws, spending more time alone. Meanwhile, David, 10, in Iowa, loves playing video games. His parents encourage him to play outside more. David feels pressured to change who he is. Both Aisha and David want their parents to accept them for who they are, not who their parents want them to be. Finding family activities with a 10 year old that both of you enjoy can be a wonderful way to bridge the gap and create positive memories together.
Try "turning towards the bid." When your child expresses any interest, respond positively. Even something small. If they say, "This song is so cool," resist the urge to say, "Turn that noise down!" Instead, say this: "Oh yeah? Who sings it?" Smaller moves include: 1. Schedule a weekly "device-free" hour for a suitable activity for a 10 year old, like board games or reading aloud. 2. Ask your 10-year-old to teach you something they are good at. When you show genuine interest, they are more likely to open up. Expect more connection and fewer closed doors.
Your 10-year-old is becoming their own person. Accept them for who they are, not who you want them to be. Show interest in their world, and they'll be more likely to invite you into it.
🤔 Which thinking lens(es) did you use?
Select all the lenses you used while thinking about this:
Common Questions
Try art journaling! Get a blank notebook and some colorful pens. Encourage your 10-year-old to draw, write, and collage. Art journaling is a great way to express emotions and boost creativity. It provides a safe space for self-exploration and can be a fun, relaxing activity.
Have a themed movie night! Pick a movie, make costumes, and prepare snacks that match the theme. For example, if you're watching a pirate movie, dress up as pirates and make "seaweed" (green fruit snacks). This creates a memorable and immersive experience. Remember, engagement is key!
Try reverse geocaching! Hide a small, personalized treasure in a public place. Give your 10-year-old GPS coordinates to find it. It's like a real-life video game that gets you both exploring and creating memories.
Build a fort! Use blankets, pillows, chairs, and anything else you can find. Make it cozy inside with books and snacks. Building a fort encourages imagination and teamwork. Once built, tell stories or play games inside. One parent I know, desperate to entertain a 10 year old, found an old appliance box and let her daughter turn it into a whole house.
Try cooperative board games. These games encourage teamwork rather than competition. Everyone works together to achieve a common goal. It's a fun way to build communication skills and promote positive relationships. Pandemic and Forbidden Island are popular choices.
Organize a scavenger hunt! Create clues that lead to different locations. The final clue leads to the birthday cake or presents. Scavenger hunts encourage teamwork, problem-solving, and physical activity. For an added layer of fun, personalize the clues to the birthday child's interests. One set of parents I know planned a whole city-wide hunt, using riddles about their daughter's favorite places.
Volunteer together! Find a local charity or organization. Spend a few hours helping others. Volunteering teaches empathy and responsibility. It also provides a sense of purpose and accomplishment. Animal shelters, food banks, and community gardens are great options.
Acknowledge their feelings without judgment. Instead of saying, "Don't be dramatic!" try saying, "I can see you're feeling really upset right now." Validating their emotions helps them feel understood and supported. Then, gently ask if they want to talk about it. If they say no, respect their space but let them know you're there when they're ready. Psychologist Haim Ginott said, "Feelings first, then facts."